Red Ensign #16

(arrrgh! Numbers in my head! I've changed the title of this post to reflect the fact that this is #16 of the Standard, not #17 as stated before)

The Standard has been raised by The Phantom Observer. Be sure to check out VW's efforts, and stand in awe at the lovely HTML table!

If you needed anymore incentive to read the Standard, here it is: Some of us (including yours truly) made a promise to submit our entry this time. The idea was to make it easier on the Standard err... raiser by limiting the number of blogs on the blogroll that he had to check. Unfortunately, some of us (read: me) forget (read: lazy-assed) to submit our entries (read: make his job a little easier). Nonetheless, The Phantom Observer has overlooked my dishonourable act and given me a spot anyways.

He truly is a class act (read: Temujin grovelling).

Krazy Korn Konversion

Brian Welch, guitarist for the heavy metal band Korn, has quit the band. His recent conversion to Christianity is cited as the reason for his departure:

According to the announcement on the Korn website, "Korn has parted ways with guitarist Brian Head Welch, who has chosen the Lord Jesus Christ as his savior, and will be dedicating his musical pursuits to that end."

It seems as though Welch and the bad departed amicably, which is exceedingly good. It is also somewhat surprising, considering the lyrical content of the song "GoodGod"

You came into my life without a single thing
I gave into your ways, but you left me with nothing
I've given into smiles, I've dealt with all your games
I wish you're happy now, I had to let you win

Why don't you get the fuck out of my face, now!!
Why don't you get the fuck out of my face, now!!

Back in the day, this was one of my favourite tunes. I read the lyrics with a bit of a different spin now, and I bet Welch does as well. I'd like to hear more about the circumstances that brought about this change in him. He'll probably get a zillion requests by churches in North America, and I bet we'll see him "on tour" soon.

The potential this guy has to influence kids in a positive way is huge. He isn't the type of person to just cater to the Christian sub-culture either. He is a credible example to young people, and his advice and testimony will almost certainly be taken more seriously by teens because he of that authenticity.

God is still doing good stuff in people's lives after all. Who knew?

Fine Fisking

Misha has done the world a tremendous service by spicing up a speech made by Kofi Annan.

It is my service to issue an extreme bad language alert, as well as an EXTREME DRINK ALERT. Put down your coffee/soda/beer/other tasty beverage before you click that link. You have been warned.

Warning: Drink Alert

Jer at the American Warmonger has declared war, in a most hilarious manner. He's got his entire army chosen, and all I'm gonna say is this: I'm glad I'm not the enemy.

The Wonder Twins alone scare the hades out of me.

...they have the uncanny knack of slipping in a good jab without actually offending anyone. I'm not really sure how they do it. However it's done, it's an extremely valuable talent for a superhero.

Hey Julie, what does your hubby think of that superhero outfit? :-)

Prime Time Sports

Today on Prime Time Sports (watching is rapidly becoming a habit...), a viewer posted a text message which was scrolled across the bottom of the screen. It said something to the effect of: "The CBC hires George Stromboulopoulos but fires Chris Cuthbert. What the hell is wrong with them?"

Absolutely priceless. That the CBC would dump a twenty-year veteran of the station, and yet still employ this no-good hack is mind-boggling.
MotherCorp (tm) claimed that his dismissal was due to the cancellation of the NHL hockey season. How odd that a man who covered everything from the NHL to the Olympics to Figure Skating to Skiing to CFL football would receive the axe.

Cuthbert jumped to the forefront of sports television with his work during a NHL playoff game in New Jersey in 1988.

A power failure in Montreal forced Hockey Night in Canada to switch to a Washington vs. New Jersey game. Cuthbert was supposed to supply updates to the national broadcast but when the focus shifted, he became host, analyst, commentator and runner.

Cuthbert was nominated for a Gemini Award for that program.

Bob Cole can suck an egg. Harry Neale is a bum. Dick Irvin is a windbag. And don't even get me started on Greg "worst colour-commentator EVER" Millen. Cuthbert deserved better. He'll find himself a job in no time.

Missionizing the Evangelicals

(Editor's Note: This post has turned into a mish-mash of random thoughts. I started out thinking it would be concise, but instead it is absolute ramble. I'm just too dang lazy to sift through it and make changes, so I'm posting it as is. For those who aren't interested in Jesus talk, you may click the "back" button on your browser now!)

Today's editorial cartoon in the *spit* National Post *spit* is fantastic.

The focus of this cartoon is, of course, the Anglican Church's seeming acceptance of homosexuality as an acceptable lifestyle choice. There is more than enough commentary out there on the SSM issue, and certainly enough opinion on homosexuality within the church. Oddly enough however, upon seeing this cartoon, my thoughts were redirected to my time at Columbia Bible College. I took a great class called "Foundations of Christian Mission", as well as other classes in evangelism and theology that really got me thinking about how we (loosely defined, the western church) have gone about the evangelization of the world. It struck me that in many ways, the church in countries like Mongolia, Ethiopia, and even Pakistan provide a WAY better example of dedication to God and perserverance than we do. As P.J. O'Rourke suggests in his book "Peace Kills", Egypt may be a more Christian nation than Sweden!

Church-goers in my neck of the woods tend to be quite content (read: rigid) in their faith. We chide the apparent cultural backwardness of those in other countries, all-the-while ignorant that Christian culture in North America is the very thing that prevents meaningful evangelization here at home! Our language, our music, and our clique mentality is exactly what turns people off.

The term "holier-than-thou" is bantered about quite frequently. This is primarily because to many Christians in North America, anything that isn't utterly Biblical is seen as fully negative (or at the very least, less-than-desirable). My professor in the Christian Mission class told a story of an experience he had. For most of the 1990's, he was a businessman in Saudi Arabia. His business? "Importing and Exporting". His business title gave him credibility. It allowed him to work and travel with relative freedom in a country that would otherwise not allow him to do so. Last time I checked, Saudi Arabia wasn't exactly inviting Christians to preach Jesus to the masses! In order to develop relationships with the ordinary Joe (or Akbar, if you will) in Saudi Arabia, he had to appear credible. This included taking part in daily prayers, and other Muslim activities. Upon returning to Canada, he began working with Croatian refugees in the Greater Vancouver area. As a part of his work, he would pray in the same manner as the Muslims (lay down a small mat, get down on his knees, bow and pray, etc). At first, those around him were leary. They saw this as syncretism in its worst form. Imagine: a Christian praying like a Muslim- the horror! However, his efforts were largely successful because the Muslim refugees saw in him someone who actually cared. His view was that the form is secondary to the meaning. That is, he knew he was praying to God. He never wavered from preaching the truth about Jesus. That he did this with methods that were not traditional was not important. And God was glorified.

The bottom line is this: doing what the Romans do does not make one a Roman. In fact, it can make you a whole lot more credible to the Romans!

Thank you

I never met you. I don't know much about where you came from, where you grew up, what your hobbies were.

Nonetheless, it is my earnest hope to live my life half as honorably as you lived yours. For I could never hope to match your bravery, courage, and dedication to freedom.

R.I.P. Major George Schneider
Our loss is certainly heaven's gain.

Stanley Cup Ring to Misha

Took the words right outta my mouth

Good Call, Markus:

The Canucks captain told the Vancouver Sun that the lawsuit against Todd Bertuzzi and others is a money grab by a player who simply isnt good enough to make a living in the NHL.

"He's suing everyone so he can make money," Naslund told the Vancouver Sun from Sweden. "I've got no respect for him at all.

"Even talking to his teammates, it seems evident he doesn't have a lot of support in hockey."

I have to agree.

Update 7:05pm- I was watching "Prime Time Sports with Bob McGowan" on Sportsnet earlier. They talked about how wrong it was for Markus to call it a cash-grab, and for beinging in Moore's former Avalanche teammates into it. Quite frankly, Markus is just calling a spade a spade. Moore is an easily replaceable fourth liner, and in all likelyhood would not have been offered a new contract from Colorado (healthy or not). I don't think he even qualifies for financial compensation from the union. One the of the guys on the show, I think his name is Gordon Brunt, suggested that Steve Moore merely wants "his day in court". The debate then revolved around why Moore would want such a thing, with the obvious answer: to get money!
And as far as chiding Naslund for mentioning Moore's former teammates, I don't hear Sakic, Hejduk, Forsberg, Blake, Damphousse, Konowalchuk, Laperriere, Skrastins, Sauer, or Hinote speaking out on his behalf. Not even the veritable Bobby Boughner has expressed his support for Moore, let alone Peter Worrell!
If Steve Moore's intentions were even remotely honourable, he'd drop this stupid lawsuit, sign a book deal and write an autobiography. Hell, even I'd support him in that.

Update 7:05 pm, Tuesday Feb 22: Corrections: it is Prime Time Sports with Bob McCown, and it was Steven Brunt, not Gordon Brunt as suggested.

Funeral Arrangements

When I die, I would like to donate my body to science. Heck, if someone needs a kidney or liver or heart, let 'em have it. I certainly won't be needing them where I'll be going. At the very least, I think it would be cool to offer university medical students a chance to probe and prode and explore. I'm not exactly the healthiest specimen, but I bet more than one student could learn a thing of two from my cold, dead carcas.

However, after reading this nonsense that Andrew at Bound by Gravity has had to go through regarding his grandmother's final request, my act of good will may not be received:

In order to have your body donated to science you have to pay the schools to take it, and then pay again to prevent them from scattering your ashes in a "common area".
********************
Relatively few people donate their bodies to science upon death, and whether or not your donation will be accepted is based on what is needed at the time of your death in the area you live. In my grandmother's case, Queens University is currently only accepting "healthy" corpses - so her cancer-devoured donation will not be accepted.(emphasis in original, ed.)

*shakes head* I better watch it, my blood is beginning to boil.

Down Under

Oh yeeeeeeeaaaaah... Marauding Marsupial. Sweetness!

It is mildly humourous to think that I am currently ranked higher than No Pundit Intended, Blue Tory, Taylor & Company, and Shenanigans, all blogs which I think are a lot more insightful and thought-provoking than WCC.

However, they aren't a part of the American Flag League. My membership into this elite force really kicked my blog up a notch... kicked it up to the moon, and put me into Marsupiality.

Aren't blogrolls fantastic?

Random Link

A random click on Instapundit's sidebar brought me here.

Heretic, indeed!

Expanded Vocabulary

Inoculatte (v): To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

More over at Seth's place. Let the hilarity ensue.

(Update 3:35pm- You know... I wish Seth would join the TTLB Ecosystem... it is really easy...)

You know, they have pills for that sort of thing.

There is this angry fellow. Really Angry, actually. Angry in the Great White North, in fact.

Apparently he's joined this "Red Ensign Bloggers" thingee. I guess it's some sort of really neat-o blogroll, some of you may of heard about it. Anyways, this really angry guy needs a lot of loving. It's the only way (besides medication) that his anger will subside.

After all, we can't have these kinds of posts being propagated, can we? The tone and invective of such posts are positively... angry. This guy is like, the trans-fatty acid of the blogosphere. Something must be done! If this thing spreads, millions could be affected.

All kidding aside though, welcome aboard!

The Truth About Moore

The Truth about Michael Moore

MooreWatch
Moore Exposed
David Hardy's examination of BFC
Moore Lies
Michael Wilson takes on Moore!
Bowling For Truth
Fahrenheit 911 Exposed
JPerspective's Moore Quotes

What Others are saying.

In an attempt to clean up my sidebar, I've decided to create this post. I used to have a number of comments that people have made about me or my blog posted on the right. Now there is a simple link that brings you here.

What others are saying

"West Coast Chaos is a daily read of mine." Joel Gaines, N.P.I.

"Politics and Hockey! It's Nirvana, baby!" The Monger

"I read your blog daily and love it! It's the best!!" The MJM Drill Wife

"It's official: I love you" Wide Awake Chase

"Temujin is clearly a solid character..." Jason Hayes of Musings

"Good Work." Leo Knight of Prime Time Crime

Strike Away!

Look at what I stole from someone learned how to do!

Woo Hoo! Muahahahah! HEHEHE!

Stupid Temujin

How the heck did I forget to link to this, the longest recorded fisking in the history of the blogosphere? An excerpt (the italics are Kerry's workds, the rest is pure Dipnut):

Look, it's not easy being a Republican these days. Sure, you can shred civil liberties, tar-and-feather unwed mothers, terrorize minorities, wage imperial war, and do nothing to find this kind of place of discussion. But, thanks to Roe vs. Wade, you can't have any actual draconian policies. It's damn frustrating.

And under President Clinton, abortion went down because we did have adequate family planning services, because we talked about counseling, adoption and other kinds of things.

As opposed to humping, I guess.

Stop! It hurts... it huuuurrrrrrrts!

Dang, I'm laughing a lot today. That's not a bad thing either.

I didn't realize the Monger was a Canucks fan:

A shortened NHL season presents a mixed blessing to Vancouver Canucks fans. On the plus side, it means we'll skip right over the usual October slump. On the negative side, we're right in time for the annual February skid.

At least Naslund won't break his leg this year, and Bertuzzi can't get suspended since he's... well, still suspended. And just who in the blue hades would start in goal for us? Chris Levesque?

I still hate Gary Bettman though. I've never been much of a pro-union kind of guy, but I've got more sympathy for them than most this time around. Bettman and the owners have not budged an inch. Fiends!

Hillary vs Condi in 2008?

From the Caveman:

I’m not sure Condi can stop Hillary. However, I also don’t think anyone in Washington needs to worry about stoppng Hillary. The voters will stop her.

hehehe!

Red Ensign Standard

Oh yeah, baby. The Standard has been raised!

This thing has turned into an absolute monster. Look at all the Red Ensign members on that list! Never one to back down from a challenge though, Chris (aka "the Dragon Slayer", the "Conquering Beast", the "I'm not gonna let 40+ blogs intimidate me!") of Striving against Opposition has done an exceptional job of hoisting the Standard. Thanks so much for your hard work, you noble, honourable sap!

Take the time to read it all, and click those links. It is totally worth it. There is something there for everybody.

Update 1:00pm- Thanks to Trudeaupia, I'm reminded that this is the fortieth anniversary of the Maple Leaf. I'm kind of neutral when it comes to our flag. It does not stir emotions in me as the stars 'n stripes does for many Americans. And that is too bad. Nonetheless, I am a patriot, and grew up with this flag as my national emblem. I respect the Maple Leaf, but I am also not ignorant of Canadian history. Whether Red or Blue, the Ensign is a vital part of that history.

A sad, lonely post

Happy Effing Valentine's Day.

*Spit!*

More Taxes, please

A tax for those who cannot do mathematics.

Or, as some like to call them: lottery tickets.

I've never been a big fan of them, but when I was younger (but still of legal age) I would "play" Sports Action. To me, this lottery actually required some knowledge and skill to go along with the luck factor. I could bet on the outcomes of three to six games. If I was correct: big money! If I was wrong: I was out at least two bucks (usually I didn't bet any more than that).
It was even more fun when a group of guys got together. We'd all chip in a couple of bucks, pick one game each we thought was a sure-thing, and then harpoon the guy who picked incorrectly.
"I told you not to bet on the Sharks! They're terrible!"
And way-back-when, the Sharks were terrible.
"But they are giving 3:1 odds! How could I resist?"

James Lileks weighs in here, and sums it up nicely. One could theoretically have more fun just lighting your money on fire. My hatred for "scratch 'n win" lottery tickets runs exceedingly deep. I have vowed never to give them out as Christmas presents, and upon receiving them I gripe bitterly for a solid minute... before scratching like a fiend and cursing aloud at the rigged system of false hope.

I used to work at a 7-Eleven.

Before the reality situates itself and I am reminded of how much of my life I wast... errr... spend gainfully employed by the Southland Corporation, let me proceed with my thought. As am employee of 7-Eleven, I had the dubious honour of selling these scratchy little nuggets to all sorts of folks. Normally, it was only a mild annoyance, but occasionally serving lottery "customers" turned into an intensely frustrating experience.
"I'll take two of these" *pause for a moment*
"That'll be two dollars, please."
"Oh, and one of these..." *pause for a moment*
"Alright... four dollars please."
"And... one of these too, and this one... and can I see that one for a sec?"
"*Sigh* Yes... yes of course... will that be all then?"
"Yes that's all"

*two minutes later,same customer*

"Could I have one of those as well?"
"NO! No, you may not! Get lost and stop holding up the line! Can't you see how infantile your pathetic addiction truly is? Look at all these people waiting to get served. GET LOST!"

Oh, uh, sorry 'bout that. Went a little off the deep end there... hypothetical situation, after all. Never really happened that way... where was I again? Oh yes.

At Christmas time, these occurances were magnified a hundred-fold. The British Columbia Lottery Corporation must lick it's chops everytime Christmas comes around. They sell millions of dollars worth of scratch and lose tickets during the week leading up to December 25th. I know. I've seen it. And it drove me crazy.

People should be able to spend their money on whatever they want. But I cannot fathom why people would want to spend so much of it on those stupid scratch tickets.

(Stanley Cup Ring to Nicolas)

Wow

This is kinda neat. Type in your name and see how popular it has been in the last hundred years.

(Stanley Cup Ring to Leave a Mark, Eh?)

My prayer

Dear Almighty God,

In your benevolent mercy, I ask that you please rid this world of the stunningly pathetic group known as the United Nations. I'm not one to suggest how You could do it, but a localized flood at their HQ in New York would be a good start, followed by a storm of fire and brimstone, and a good plague of locusts or gnats to finish 'em off. If you aren't into that kind of business anymore, I ask... no... beseech thee... turn the hearts of mankind. Help them to see how horrible this filthy conglomerate of hemorrhoidial stew truly is. In Your holy timing, Amen.

Even if you aren't the God-fearing type, you can certainly echo that sentiment after reading this:

United Nations peace keepers stationed in the Democratic Republic of Congo (DRC) have been banned from having sex with local residents as a result of allegations of widespread sexual abuse of women and girls by peace keepers. UN Secretary-General Kofi Annan sent a letter to the Security Council requesting a curfew and 100 more military police to monitor the abuse.

I can't even make fun of this. I am too sickened. Mr. Annan is, of course, "deeply shocked and outraged:"

At least seven cases of sexual exploitation and abuse have been substantiated against peace keepers serving in Bunia, in north-eastern Congo, where the UN is helping the country to recover from years of conflict. Children as young as 12 have been bribed with eggs, milk or a few dollars in exchange for sex, according to UN reports.

Demarche has more details. He also mentions his need to throw up. Hey Doc: I'll hold the bucket for you if you hold it for me.

Sickening, absolutely sickening.

Book Blog

1. Grab the nearest book.
2. Open the book to page 123.
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the text of the sentence in your journal along with these instructions.
5. Don’t search around and look for the “coolest” book you can find. Do what’s actually next to you.


"Hull skated across the blue line down the right side, leaving the puck for Norwood."

From: Blue Fire: A Season Inside the St. Louis Blues, by Dave Simmons, 1993.

(Appropriately, Stanley Cup Ring to Seth)

You are not alone

I'm right there with ya, Coshinator. Insanity.

But the real question is, are any of us really surprised?

Bowel Buddy

Yeah man, I hear ya.

As many of you know who frequent this sight, I am employed by a Carpet Cleaning and Restoration company. Part of my duties include scrubbing and waxing floors for businesses. One such scrub 'n wax job that I have a rather fond memory of occurred at the Nature's Pantry here in Smithers. It is a health food store complete with herbal supplements, inner-self enhancement tools, and a whole host of products for digestive and dietary wholeness. Of particular interest to my co-worker and I was a product known as "Bowel Buddy". Upon seeing this product on the shelf, my co-worker (who is a close friend) and I proceeded to laugh our proverbial asses off. Could you imagine actually bringing this up to the check-out line and paying for it? How socially awkward and/or embarrassing!

Maybe you had to be there.
I dunno.
But it was the most hilarious thing, and I even half-expected my friend to give me a box as a gag gift at Christmas.

Good times, good times. Nonetheless, if I need some regularity in my life, I stick with the tried-and-true method.

Short and Sweet and to the Point

I've been trying to figure out how to properly express my feelings at seeing Jean Chretian testify at the Gomery inquiry. Fortunately, this pretty much sums it up for me:

The majority of Canadians are not pissed off because you thought you were saving the country from breaking up Jean, they're pissed off because your government, which you are ultimately responsible for, decided to create a program that was lining the pockets of your Liberal buddies throughout Quebec to the tune of a hundred million dollars.

And those pathetic prosecutors did nothing but throw softball questions at the wryly political veteran. He was practically given a free pass, and he comes out appearing noble and honourable, in the eyes of our benevolent CBC and their no-good hacks. Thank God there are guys out there like Bob who see through this horse pucky.

One final thought about ol' Georgey boy at CBC's "the Hour": Buddy, you were a no-good hack at MuchMusic, and you are a no-good hack with the CBC.

Say, is anyone up for a good google bombing? Just a thought, that's all.

Awwwwwww

Cute, real cute.

A True Hero

"It's too simple to say what he did was heroic," said Najat Abdul Sattar, the headmistress of the school, where bright-eyed children study in dim concrete classrooms just yards from where Amir was killed. "What more honor could we give the man?"

What more, indeed? He did not die in vain.

Stanley Cup Ring to Alan at Occam's
(Update 9:30pm- Funniest zinger I've heard in a while: "...you feckless lardpate!" Oh my guts... it hurts... it hurts!)

Solid Mennonite, indeed

Welcome Rempelia to the Red Ensign Brigade!

Don't forget to ask for extra sour cream on your perogies, m'heh.

Maybe it's just me...

I think IOC President Jacques Rogge is a big friggin' hypocrit. On the one hand, he takes NHL players to task for not accepting a salary cap, saying:

...Olympic athletes don't go on strike 'for a minimum salary of $6 million,'

but only minutes before, he accepted bids for television contracts worth $153 million US. No caps involved when you are the big beneficiary, eh Jacques? I wonder if the IOC has a written salary cap for its Presidents...

But of course, in Jacques' case, it was never only about the money.

"It was a combination of the enhancement of the Olympic brand in Canada, promotion for the Games, the support to sports federations and athletes in Canada, and also the finances," Rogge said.

Yeah, right, of course. You steeeeenkin' weasel. You remind me of another Jacques I'm not too fond of.

Perhaps the real story here ought to revolve around the poor CBC, which has lost out on what is sure to be a big draw for Canadian viewers. Say, is anyone out there feeling even remotely sorry for our publically funded monopoly... the one that just got schooled in the fine art of 21st century, big business, merger-style capitalism?

No better friend, no worse enemy.

Nick D is officially a Marine!

And more good news, he's actually able to post on his blog for the first time in months!

The terrorists must be shaking in their sandals.

"Colorful" just doesn't quite describe it

From Sir Banagor (Warning: extreme bad language alert):

The United Nations is a rotten fucking festering swamp of inane bureaucrats over which I wouldn’t cry a goddamned tear if they were tortured to death on live TV and then had their heads cut off because, you see, that isn’t an “atrocity” to me at all – and my political views should be just as valid as theirs.

Or maybe they aren’t, because I don’t sit in that august body of corruption and filth.

You've got to read the whole thing. To call it "Colorful" is certainly accurate, but doesn't really do it justice.

"Sheer Brilliance", is perhaps more appropriate.

Tip of the Cap

Say hello to Rue of the fine blog Abraca-Pocus!, newest member of the Red Ensign Brigade.

So I guess being bald ain't so bad after all.