Monday, August 21, 2006

Big Whitey

I was about to get ready for bed when I heard a knock at the door. A neighbour had the sad duty to inform me that Big Whitey had been killed in a car accident. I had let him out when I got home from work earlier, and hadn't even thought to let him back inside. Normally he is alright, but tonight he picked the wrong night to be on the road.

Poor cat had one helluva life. Deaf from birth and quite overweight, he bumbled and stumbled his way gracefully through life. He always enjoyed looking through the window and following the birds as they fed from the feeders outside. He was also quite fond of lazing around in the grass in the yard.

R.I.P. Big Whitey
September 2001-August 2006

And a special note to the motherfucking parasite that ran him over and ended his life outside my fucking house and didn't even have the decency or courage to own up to it: if I ever, ever, EVER find out who you are, I will beat your fucking brains in with a shovel. I will rip your heart out and and shove it up your ass so you can feel it beating in your colon before you die. Fucking Fucking Fucking SHITBAG with a capital S.H.I.T.B.A.G. May you reap exactly what you sow, asshole.
At the very least, I'll sleep tonight knowing that someday you will get exactly what is coming to you, you miserable, wretched, vile, maggot-infested hemorrhoid on the ass of humanity.

My public service announcement for all readers of WCC: PAY ATTENTION WHEN DRIVING IN RESIDENTIAL AREAS AT NIGHT!